Da Boss

I saw Springsteen in concert at the Rose Garden on Friday night. Dude is like 59 and did not stop playing for 2.5 straight hours, no joke. I'm not a huge fan, but the Mrs. is and after seeing him life and reading up on his story, guy gets mad respect from me. Hands down, dude rocks. Highlights: Max Weinberg, minus Conan; Clarence Clemons, the guy everyone wants to be; Steven Van Zandt, with bandanna in check. Seriously, these guys rocked the house like it was 1978 all over again.

mixed cassettes

I got put onto this mixtape website.

muxtape.com

Simply upload 12 mp3s and there you have it. Here's a little sample somthin somthin guaranteed to give orgasms to your ear-pussies.

one take

old to the new

- the new crackbook -

My computer broke, I am forced to use this macbook. Not that there is anything wrong with it, but I mean, seriously, it's a little bit different than the old eichpee I been on for the last four years.- the old eichpee -

Also, I don't have anything plugged into the new mac, like veoh TV or reason. Ah, eichpee, how i miss thy comforting keystrokes. Anyways, that sucks. I hope I can fix my old boy sooner than later, I hate iTunes!!!!!!

Hot For Teacher

Of the many inspirations one can find to teach, these are questionable:

Why I don't wear boots anymore (Nolte style):


Best Student Pranks:


For Posterity:

Stolen Lesson Plan

This guy stole my whole shtick.

Where they went wrong

Most of the time these guys were pretty on point. But, when it comes to the Ishtar review, these guys took themselves too seriously.

This just in: Ebert just as popular as Shalit

-Ebert with some mustache-haver guy who is not Shalit-

How could this be? I guess my propaganda campaign was to no avail. Damn dun, Shalit can't even get respect beyond the grave. That makes me think that my screenplay for Ghostdad 2 will not get a greenlight.

Bonus:
Siskel & Ebert Predator review 1987

"I capped off 200 rounds on the mini-gun...nothin'"

The Password Is...

Another mustachioed master of the small screen: Rip Taylor.

-this time it's extremely gay personal-

Doritos Meet Shalit's Half Son

Nothing can top the savory crunch of the Dorito getting in your stache, as this pair of 70's commercials illustrate.

the price IS right

Bob Barker is pushed to his vertical limit by this extremely low functioning contestant. The longer it goes on the funnier it gets.

BONUS:
The Price is Right Theme

pretty, pretty proud

I'm about to watch teh last episode of the wire. You may now begin being jealous.

More Motivation

This touches on some of the same emotions as the Al Pacino speech. The only difference? Al Pacino didn't spend four hours in the basement drinking coffee before making his speech.

License 2 Drizive

Oh snap, who would have guessed that Carol Kane, Richard Masur and Heather Graham would be cast behind the Coreys? Here is your chance to see why; License To Drive is playing, for free, on the internets. Get there here.

What did Gene Shalit say about it? I thought you'd never ask.

"My moistest of memories memorized by moment could not break the spell of splendor that this titillating tale treated the theater goers to; that is, the Coreys are cute, courageous and cataloged under creamy for the way they made my meat melt."

Free Movie Ressurection??

In light of Stage6 (RIP) being on teh deaded side of things I have been trolling the internets in search of a suitable replacement site that will offer the same divx quality at an affordable (free) rate. In this process I have returned to my movie aggregation point of choice, 66 Stage, in search of da bomb azz ish.

While the fact remains that the nicely designed divx movies have been eliminated for good, I have investigated the possibility that a certain Veoh may be the heir apparent for high-quality vids. Yes, it is basically a youtube clone; however, it does allow for better quality than youtube currently (italics mine, all mine) allows.

Oh yeah, in order to get with these movies you have to sign up and download a player that resides on your hard drive. After that, I suppose you're home free. Let's check in with Gene Shalit and Harpo Marx's son and see what they think about it:

Oh yesh, I almost forgot:
10,000 B.C. = boring
Thanks for saving the ticket price Veoh!

Gene Shalit says:
"This film flowed through my mustache with the pizzaz of a point break and the precision of a premature ejaculation."

Chinee Movie: CJ7

I am super stoked that I finally got to see CJ7 last night. It was a long time coming as it had been released in China during the Chinee New Year break.

As for the movie, it was awesome. The effects were on par with past Steve Chow flicks Kung Fu and Shaolin Soccer. There was still a good amount of laughs even though there are now requisite social and emotional elements to Chow's movies.

The only downside, for me, was the scarcity of Chow on screen; in fact, he seems to occupy more of a supporting actor role. That may be part of his master plan to get more done behind the camera, and unfortunately not deliver as many punchlines. This being the case, the lead actor portraying Chow's son - the young and female Xu Jiao - comes through with some real funny ish. S/he is placed in a number of situations that reference a number of Chow movies but include tributes to some foreign ones as well (Mission Impossible!!!).

Furthermore, the supporting cast continues to feature the usual cast of freaks and weirdos that Chow loves to have us gawk at. One of my favorites is the track and field coach with the worlds highest shorts.

No spoilers here just get out there and see it in the theater if you can. I am going to look for it on the internets, so maybe I'll post a link later.

Gene Shalit says:
"I give it three mustaches twisted up in a Rollie Fingers salute."

Movies by Numbers: Old School...I mean Semi-Pro

I just saw the semi-pro. Definitely has some funny scenes, but the formula for making these films just keeps on getting used.

Nothing against Will Farrell; the guy is hilarious. Woody was good too. Just seeing the same plot points get hit over and over again can be grating. I highly recommend seeing this one on the internets for free. In fact, jsut watching the ads is just about as entertaining as the actual movie.

Despite being deaded, Gene Shalit may still have loved it. In fact he was resurrected by Vincent Price and is said to have called this film a "whimsical warriors-esque wemake of west side story."

Life Skillz

Yo! If you are ever needing some tips on crowd control techniques, say in a classroom, check out these vids. They're guaranteed to warrant results. Period.

Force:


Motivation:


Good Stories: